29 Nov

Dear Lord,

Inhabit me as I go through this loose exercise on envisioning my desired life. This exercise may itself be a distraction of the false spirit, which is all the more reason I ask that You be with me. 

Lord, I've been distant and distraught. I've struggled and failed against temptation. I feel as I've regressed years recently. But I also know that's not a good analysis of my situation. I know Your mercy is always there as soon as I let You in. You hold me in your forgiving and loving embrace as soon as I willingly turn toward You and say, "yes, Lord."

I have sinned, surely. Surely, I have. But I know the distance between my worst sin, and  my best behavior is infinitesimally small compared to my best day and your perfection. Lord, deliver me from evil! Please!

I have committed to working out recently, because I believe that the combination of being so out of shape, not particularly active, poor nutrition, and it being the winter has made me very susceptible to some types of sin. To sin which centers around dopamine chasing. Concupiscence. Sins of consumption. And indeed I did my second workout just a while ago, and I feel a sense of verve and strength I haven't felt in a while. I understand it's fleeting for the moment, but I also know it's a good sign of what's to come. I know that at a  point this feeling becomes persistent.

Lord, I don't want to be in the cult of the body, but I know that being in good health helps me avoid sin, and helps me to serve you better. It helps me to be more patient, and kind. It leaves me more energetic. It leaves me more resilient, and optimistic.

Lord, please be with me, and please help me to stay on this path of health and fitness.


In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy spirit. Amen.